Tag Archives: why doesn’t God seem to care?


Since I took over as pastor of Faith in God Church, attendance has been near zero week in, week out. The church was dead to the point that I spend many Sundays and most Wednesdays conducting services by myself. Not good for someone who suffers self-esteem issues, anyway, right?
What that time alone did however, was drive me to my knees. In the process of talking with God I learned one very important fact. If the church was going to grow, it wouldn’t be me doing it. Should I quit I asked The Creator. He said no. The verse kept coming to my mind, “Except the Lord build the house he who labors labors in vain.” And Paul’s statement, “I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase.” And “Except the Spirit draws him, no one can enter the kingdom of God.”

Don’t you care, God?

I quickly realized that it wasn’t me who was in charge of making things happen around here. It was the Holy Spirit who would draw people to my church.
So my prayers went from-What am I supposed to be doing?-to-What are you doing God? Why are you not moving here? Don’t you care that people are dying and going to hell? Don’t you care that your reputation is on the line if this church fails?
The hardest part was that my estranged husband, the one who emotionally and physically abused me, who moved an atheist into what had been my bed was financially doing well and said he was happy. He said he felt sorry for me and wouldn’t want to be in my shoes.
I realize that I don’t know the outcome of all this. I realize that God knows what he’s doing even though I don’t understand any of the whys that are put in my path. I know that God loves me and he loves my husband too. He even loves that atheist and if all this eventually brings her to her knees, then maybe it will all be worth it in the end. I pray that is true. This world is a small

In the Darkest Hour

Last week, three nights in a row, the Lord gave me his answer in the darkest hour of the night. The first night he told me that he wanted to do a new thing with the church here. He said that he wanted to reach the younger generation that was not being reached by the churches in this area. He said he wanted youthful music played by young musicians and vocalists. He wanted a youth pastor here, and he wanted a children’s ministry.
I thought that’s all fine and good, but I am none of those things. He said that it was because I was willing to get out of his way and let him do what he wanted to do here. He said that he wanted the torch to pass from one generation to the next, but the older generation had not prepared the upcoming generation to take over so the churches around here were dying. My job was to make certain that torch was passed.
The following night God woke me again. This time he gave me the name of two people to contact to pray with me about what God wanted to do here. I asked him if he wanted me to contact several other people that I knew and he said, no, just contact the ones I told you. So I did. The first one agreed to pray and the second (who was on the church board) gave me permission and agreed to pray specifically for a youth pastor, someone to head the children’s ministries and about getting a Christian Rock Band organized.
The next night, again he woke me. This time he gave me another name to contact. I contacted her and she immediately said that she would agree to head up the children’s ministry. She is substitute teacher (Means that she has a clear background check). Later that day, another woman called and said that her family would be here for services on Sunday morning. In one week, two families have agreed to come.

Asking For Your Prayers

Please pray for continued growth in this church. If you live in this area or know of anyone who may have the calling of youth pastor or feels called to use their Rock Band in Christian worship, contact me at

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Donna Brown is pastor at Faith in God Church  1 1/2 miles south of Brandsville, Missouri on Hwy 63. Sunday services are at 10 am and Wednesday night Bible Study at 6:30 pm.   As Author Cygnet Brown, she  has recently published her first nonfiction book: Simply Vegetable Gardening: Simple Organic Gardening Tips for the Beginning Gardener

She is also the author of historical fiction series The Locket Saga. which includes When God Turned His Head and Soldiers Don’t Cry, the Locket Saga Continues, and most recently, A Coward’s Solace, Book III of the Locket Saga

Her most recent publication were two booklets Help From Kelp and Using Diatomaceous Earth Around the House and Yard. Available in paperback.

.For more information about Cygnet Brown and her book, check out her website at .

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